You probably didn't notice that I skipped last week's blog post. And those of you subscribed to our weekly newsletter likely didn't notice that I skipped last week's email, too. Your inbox was too full of all the emails you did receive, so why give a second's thought to the ones you didn't? You probably also didn't notice that I only posted on our social media accounts once in the last 12 days.
So what?, you're thinking. You missed a few days. Not a big deal. And for the most part, I agree. I had to let a few things slide in order to focus on a new wedding client and complete some work for a graphic design client, among a myriad of other to-dos. But ask any social media or online marketing coach and they'll tell you never to miss a week in a weekly newsletter or go more than 3 days without a social media post, especially when you're building a new business.
While I'm airing my own grievances, I also didn't spend enough quality time with my husband, take my dog on enough walks, or get enough sleep. I wasn't available when a friend needed me, I didn't reach my monthly sales goal, and I haven't cleaned the house in weeks.
A lot of good (great!) things happened, too, and I accomplished quite a bit. But I've devoted way too much headspace to feeling guilty about the things I didn't get done, which has done me absolutely no good.
"No amount of guilt can change the past and no amount of anxiety can change the future." (unknown)
Do you tend to beat yourself up with all your should haves, would haves, could haves? What are you feeling guilty about right now? Whether you made a mistake at work, lost your sh!t with your child or said something unfortunate in a moment of stress or exhaustion, no amount of guilt will change what has already happened. How can you reallocate that energy to ensure a better outcome next time around?
In my case, I'm trying to schedule my time more effectively and work ahead of deadlines so I'm not scrambling at the last minute or having to make tough calls about what not to do. [My "fear archetype" is perfectionist/procrastinator, so this is a huge challenge for me, but we'll save that discussion for another time].
I'm also trying to extend myself some grace. GRACE, in fact, is my word for 2020 (see this post). Grace OVER guilt. It's easier said than done, of course, especially for this Type A "achiever" who was raised in the Catholic Church. But repeating this mantra over and over has already helped me let some angst go. So, give yourself some grace, my friend, no matter what's weighing you down. Take a deep breath and carry on- with joy in your heart and grace in your soul.